Rebirth

I heard something the other day that really resonated with me. It was on some tv show, can't remember which one right now. Probably because I have been watching a lot of tv lately, since that is about all I feel like doing. August has not been kind to me, well actually the end of July was pretty rough. So rough, that after driving all the way to Boston for sweet Oliver's second birthday, I missed it! I was so sick on his actual birthday, I pretty much slept the entire day. Probably due to the fact that I was up most of the night very sick at my stomach and all that goes along with that ailment. Alissa was sweet enough to bring Oliver by for a few minutes that evening after they had dinner. So I was able to see his precious little face, even if it was from a distance. Didn't want to take a chance on what I had being contagious, even tho I was pretty sure it wasn't. The ride home was a real joy, as you can probably imagine.

Have I mentioned, I hate Lupus?

 But I digress....

Back to what I heard. I don't know if it is an actual quote or just an old saying.  It wasn't credited to anyone, so going with, old saying. It went something like this...

They say you are born twice, once at your birth and again when your Mother dies.

I had never thought of it that way, but it is so true. I really believe I had a rebirth after losing my Mom. It changed me in ways I never thought possible. I grew up, when I thought I was already grown. I matured and became so very thankful for things I had taken for granted for far too long. I am still working on things, but then I am not yet 10 years old in this new life without my Mom. But I will be, soon. The 10th anniversary of her death is rapidly approaching and I am already dreading it. The only thing making it the least bit bearable is that I will be with my girls and grandbabies on the date. I know they will do wonders for my mood and it is exactly what my Mom would have wanted for me. So, I won't visit the cemetery that day, I will sit by the ocean, watch the seagulls and enjoy my family. I will miss my Mom that day, just as I have every day since she left us and will continue to do everyday until we are all together again.

And I will continue to grow.